Infertility is a whirlwind of emotions — and I’ve experienced them all. Though many of us experience the weight of infertility at different levels and in personal ways, the truth of God’s Word has the power to transform how we perceive our pain.
Anger
“If God loved me, this wouldn’t happen to me.” “A loving God wouldn’t do this to those He loved.”
- But you, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness. (Psalm 86:15
) - In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. (1 John 4:9-11)
- The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance. (2 Peter 3:9)
- This God—his way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him. (Psalm 18:30)
- Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? (Matthew 6:26)
- Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (1 Thessalonians 5:8)
Worry & Anxiety
“What will I do if I’m never a mom?” “Should I do this/that/the other?” “What if I’m too old to have kids?”
- Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
- I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)
- Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. (Psalm 37:40)
- And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:7)
Guilt & Regret
“This is my fault.” “This is my spouse’s fault.” “Maybe if I wouldn’t have done {insert reason}, then I’d have a baby.”
- Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. (Romans 5:1)
- Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1)
- “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall be like wool.” (Isaiah 1:18)
- But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead. (Philippians 3:13)
- “Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” (Isaiah 43:18-19)
Impatience
“I’ll rush this along, do whatever the doctor/internet says, exhaust my resources/body/marriage just so long as I get pregnant.”
- For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. (Romans 8:24-25)
- Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him. (Psalm 37:7)
- Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. (Romans 12:12)
- Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near. (James 5:7-8)
Discontentment
“There is nothing good about my life right now.” “I need to find a solution for my happiness.”
- [B]e content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5)
- Do not grumble against one another, brothers, so that you may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing at the door. (James 5:9)
- Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. (1 Timothy 6:6-7)
- [F]or I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:11-13)
Envy & Jealousy
“Why should she have a baby and I can’t?” “I can’t believe God would give them a child and not us.” “They don’t deserve to be parents.”
- A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot. (Proverbs 14:30)
- And I saw that all toil and all achievement spring from one person’s envy of another. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind. (Ecclesiastes 4:4)
- Wrath is cruel, anger is overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy? (Proverbs 27:4)
- Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. (Colossians 3:2)
Sadness & Hopelessness
“I’ll never be a mother.” “This will never happen to me.” “There’s no point in trying.”
- “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)
- Surely there is a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off. (Proverbs 23:18)
- For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. (Romans 8:24-26)
- “Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood,” [says the LORD]. (Isaiah 54:4)
Fear
“What if my spouse leaves me because I can’t have kids?” “What if everyone forgets about me?”
- “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6)
- When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me? (Psalm 56:3-4)
- For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)
- “Do not fear; only believe.” (Mark 5:36)
- Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (Isaiah 41:10)
Weariness
“I can’t do this anymore.”
- [T]he Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. (Romans 8:26)
- [But] we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. (Romans 5:3)
- He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:29-31)
He is faithful, he is good, and he is sovereign over your life dear sister. Be blessed!
Cover photo used with permission by Ben White on Unsplash
These are wonderful, uplifting scriptures. I love that I, too, can apply these to my every day life, in any situation with which I am faced. Thank you, Mere!
Yes Mommy love! Amen! 🙂 xo