One day I was on the receiving end of the enemy’s relentless punches. Lie after lie bruised me, and I was weary. In considering the lies I was hearing, I called upon my closest Christian infertility blogger friends to help me fight.
My sincerest thanks goes out to these eight Christ-centered women from across the country! The Lord is so merciful and gracious to connect me with my fellow sisters, and what an honor it is to unite and fight together through our common suffering.
I pray that each response will calm your heart, soothe your soul, and strengthen you for the battle ahead, dear friend. Be encouraged and blessed today!
LIE: “My body is broken beyond repair.”
Lauren Citro // Grow My Family
It’s a bit ironic that this particular lie has become a personal hurdle for me, because time and time again my fertility tests have shown no clear indicators that provide a clear reason why I wouldn’t be able to become pregnant. And yet with every failed cycle, the thought that my body must be so broken beyond repair becomes an easy lie to entertain. It feels so valid, right!?
And yet we know that not every feeling represents truth — so what does the Bible say about our bodies being broken without hope of healing?
First, time and again, we see God healing women who faced years of infertility. For example, Hannah prayed for years for a child and not only did God grant her request for a baby, but she experienced true healing that allowed her to continue to become pregnant and have children (1 Samuel 1)!
Secondly, we know that healing is more than an extra blessing that God gives out sparingly — it’s actually a core characteristic of who He is! He calls himself Jehovah Rapha, the Lord our Healer (Exodus 15:26)!
We also know that Jesus bore our sicknesses and carried our diseases (Matthew 8:17). He’s already paid the price for our healing! He’s not only able to heal us, but he is willing to! Romans 8:32 says, “He who did not spare his own Son…how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?”
In Jeremiah 32:27 the question is posed: “I am the LORD, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?” The answer is of course: no! And this is where the lie that my body is broken beyond repair has to take its last breath — because with man it may be impossible, but with God all things are possible (Matthew 19:26)!
LIE: “If I’m not a mom, then who am I?”
Jil Davis // For the Love of Joy Blog
A few years back, a question was presented to me by a friend — “If I’m not a mom, then who am I?” She wanted me to share my answer with a bible study group but, I couldn’t answer it with peace in my heart. So, I declined the opportunity. It was bitterness and anger towards infertility that kept me from doing Kingdom work that day.
As the years went by and I found peace in my circumstances, I started asking God the very same question. He shared with me many parts of His ultimate plan for infertility. One of the most profound statements He spoke, “It’s not all about you. There’s so much to this that’s about helping others.” In that moment, my heart changed, as Hannah’s did in 1 Samuel 1:18. I started living life heart wide open to His will.
The Lord gave me a mentor for this new season I found myself in. She is nameless, but her testimony is one of the very best I’ve seen in my infertility journey. Second Kings chapter 4 tells her story. Her season of barrenness focused on serving God’s people. She aligned her life to the Lord’s work while basking in the peace of her circumstances. It didn’t mean she was ‘OK’ with her infertility (2 Kings 4:16 shows her guardedness) but, she had joy in it. Others took notice and she was able to offer her talents and skills as a homemaker. For her, the statement went like this, “If I’m not a mom, then I’m a missionary advocate.”
Her story has been the launching pad for my own season. We are so much more than our ability or inability to have children! My statement today is, If I’m not a mom, then I’m a farmer’s wife, an encourager, a writer, a caretaker of His creation, and a blossoming missionary advocate myself.
LIE: “I must not be praying enough or doing enough.”
Vanessa Figueroa // My One in One Million
“God, are you withholding my miracle baby because I haven’t shown enough action behind my faith? Is it maybe because I haven’t prayed enough, God? Or maybe because I don’t measure up to being a good Christian?” I’ve rehearsed those lies over and over in my mind and have actually believed them more often than I’d like to admit in my almost seven year wait for babies — so friend, you’re not alone.
I would hammer myself for not making a faith purchase that one time, or rehearsed what sins I had committed last month that prevented me from conceiving, or even made myself feel guilty over not praying that extra hour when He woke me up in the middle of the night. “Oh yes God, I get it now, that’s why I haven’t received my miracle baby yet, or probably ever at this rate.”
I took that battle to God in prayer and researched His Word for truth and clarity. His Word is filled with promises that it is His strength and power that delivers, not my own (Psalm 32:7; Ephesians 3:20; Psalm 34:17). In prayer, I heard the Lord whisper to my heart, “Whose ruler are you using to measure your faith? Certainly not Mine. I don’t reward or punish you based on your works. There is nothing left for you to do. You’ve taken so many steps out of the boat in faith, I lost count. If I’m not keeping count, why are you? Be at peace and let your soul rest. This is My battle to fight, not yours.”
I could finally take a deep breath and rest in the sovereignty of God. He is faithful and I decided to place my unconditional trust in Him. Won’t you friend? There’s so much freedom to be found there (Galatians 5:1).
LIE: “I must not really be saved since I’m experiencing such pain.”
Melissa Forster // Borderless
Romans 10:9 says, “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”
After we choose to confess and believe, the Bible uses adoption as a picture of what God has done for us. God chose to love us as His children. He not only brings us into His family, but He makes us heirs to all His authority under heaven. And one day, when we enter eternity we will enjoy the unfathomable riches of Christ. That all sounds pretty wonderful right? So why does my heart still hurt? Why am I still struggling with delayed fertility? Why I have experienced such loss?
God didn’t promise bad things wouldn’t happen to His children. When Adam and Eve bit into the apple, sin came into the world. Our world is fallen because of sin. Sin has caused sickness, disease and death to be prevalent. These things are not from God. We don’t experience these things because of our sin or lack of faith, it’s because the enemy has interrupted God’s original design.
However, pain isn’t the end of our story. Romans 8:28 promises the Lord will work all things for our good. Even better, Romans 5:8-11 promises the Lord has defeated the greatest danger to my soul — sin.
One of my favorite heroes in the Bible is Joseph. He walked through so many terrible situations, but at the end in Genesis 50:20 he said, “What you meant to harm me, the Lord has used to change my life and the lives of many.” My prayer is as you read these words you will realize the Lord is with you in your pain, and He is working behind the scenes on your behalf.
LIE: “My situation/diagnosis is impossible/too hard for God.”
Caroline Harries // In Due Time
Have you ever believed the lie that your situation or diagnosis is too impossible for God? What if you had a revelation that God loves to birth life into impossible situations?
All throughout scripture we see God work in impossible situations and often when God performs a miracle, he reaches out with his touch or just uses a few words. As we read in Genesis, God spoke the word into existence with just three words, “And God said.” And from Genesis to Revelation we see him repeat miracle after miracle, creating life out of impossible situations.
The Word of God states in Luke 1:37, “Nothing is impossible with Him.” And then we read in Hebrews 13:8 that “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, and today, and forever.” Isn’t that good news? God is still performing miracles today.
What about the story of Abraham and Sarah? Romans 4:17-18 says, “That’s what the Scripture means when it says: ‘I have made you the father of many nations.’ He is our example and father, for in God’s presence he believed that God can raise the dead and call into being things that don’t even exist yet. Against all odds, when it looked hopeless, Abraham believed the promise and expected God to fulfill it. He took God at his word, and as a result he became the father of many nations.”
The odds were completely against Abraham and Sarah to conceive, but despite his circumstances Abraham continued to believe anyway. Not only did he believe, but he took God at His Word and expected God to fulfill His promise. And what did God do in his hopeless and impossible looking situation? He performed a miracle and created life out of a barren womb.
So what does that mean for you? No situation you are currently facing is too impossible for God to change, restore, fix, heal or perform a miracle in. God’s power is bigger than your problem and nothing is too hard for our God!
LIE: “God loves others more than me since they have children.”
Betsy Herman // Hope During Infertility
Early in our TTC journey, while on a retreat, some counselors helped me identify lies I believed about God so that I could replace them with His truth, including: “God loves others more than me since they have children.”
I couldn’t deny it. I’d believed it several years before, when my closest friends were newlyweds. I allowed this thought to settle in my mind as I donned each bridesmaid dress: “God loves them more, because He gave them husbands.” Even if that wasn’t true, the lie about children could almost be backed by Scripture. Doesn’t God say in Psalm 127 that “children are a reward,” and “blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them”? Why were we, a married Christian couple, being denied this gift from God? Infertility (and the devil) caused me to question God’s character – especially His goodness. I had to decide if I would believe the lie, or renew my mind with God’s word, meditating on Scripture that declared His goodness.
During our seven year wait, my husband constantly encouraged me to CHOOSE to believe that God is good, even when circumstances aren’t. Psalm 136:1 (and many other scriptures) declare that He is good. I chose to look for His goodness in barrenness. Thanking Him for every good thing – every financial provision, every burst of sunshine on a gloomy day – shifted my perspective to see His goodness.
I’m currently expecting our miracle baby, and I’ll be quick to say that God was just as good while we struggled to conceive as He is today. I refuse to believe that He loves me more or that His goodness is any different now that we have a baby on the way. His answer to our prayer doesn’t change His goodness toward me or His love for me.
LIE: “If God really loved me, he would give me a child.”
Jennifer Hesse // JennHesse.com
I wrestled with this thought time and again when waiting to become a mom. It seemed that granting me this one, good desire would be the best possible way for Him to show me His love. And as the wait dragged on, I became less sure that He loved me because He was hurting me by withholding this longed-for gift.
What I wasn’t remembering at that time was that God’s love is not like ours. It is infinite and unmerited. He gives us abounding, forever-enduring love, and we offer Him nothing in return. He chose and adopted us as His beloved children for no other reason than the kind intentions of His will (Ephesians 1:4-6).
Because God’s love for us is founded on His will and not our own, that means He displays His love in ways He deems best according to His purpose. We can’t know all of the reasons He gives or withholds or takes away good things in our lives. This is something we wonder when faced with suffering, just as Job cried out to God: “Your hands fashioned and made me, and now you have destroyed me altogether” (Job 10:8).
In these times of doubt, when we’re desperately yearning for something as good as having a child to love and nurture, we can find reassurance in the Cross. “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8).
God’s love for us is certain. If, when, and how He gives us children isn’t specified or guaranteed. Yet we can know that He who did not spare His own beloved Son from death in order to save us graciously gives us everything we need to live a good life for eternity.
LIE: “God is punishing me.”
Chelsea Ritchie // Trials Bring Joy
It’s easy to be trapped in the lie that “this” is a punishment. That somehow, your past mistakes or failures have caused this brokenness, that God is punishing you, infertility is your consequence. Can anyone else relate to this lie? You see, let’s face the facts. We all have sinned, big time. We have failed God over and over again, but let’s lean into this truth – when we confess our sins, when we take our messy, muddy, shame-ridden pieces to Jesus, He offers us freedom, forgiveness, and a release from our guilt. Yes, sin causes consequences, but Jesus forgives. In fact, when we look at Hebrews 12:8a, it says, “This trouble you’re in isn’t punishment, it’s training, the normal experience of a Christian.”
So why do we still feel like our trials are punishments? I think the devil wants to get us to believe that lie because it draws us away from our Father, and away from the opportunity to grow closer to Jesus. When we believe Satan, he manipulates everything we know about God’s character. It changes Him from a loving God to a vengeful God; from a Father who wants the best for His children, to a vindictive God who finds joy in our pain. That’s not who God is.
The bottom line is: God doesn’t solely reward or withhold blessings in our lives because of what we have done or not done. Let’s be honest, if that were the case, we’d all be in serious trouble. Let’s ask Jesus for the help we need to stop believing the lie and accept the freedom that Jesus is giving us. It’s only then we can really lean into this season with the chance to grow closer to God as a result.
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Which of these lies taunts you most in your season of suffering? Have you found these encouragements helpful? I want to know!
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Cover image used with permission via Unsplash.
So, so good! I pray that the truth of God’s character will comfort and guide fellow sisters during their times of waiting.
ALL the amens! Thank you again for your thoughtful words, Jenn. Praying the seeds we are sowing will bear much fruit!
ARE YOU IN NEED OF HELP TO SOLVE YOUR INFERTILITY PROBLEM OR GET PREGNANT? contact Dr. LUCAS Miracle Center on this email (miraculouscentre@gmail.com) I have been trying to get pregnant for 6 years and I needed help! I have been to different hospitals and Doctors. The doctors always say that my husband and I are fine and I don’t know where else to turn. Until one day an old friend introduced me to this great spell caster who helped her to get her lost husband back with a love spell and also made her pregnant, So I decided to contact this spell caster Dr. Lucas on his email (miraculouscentre@gmail.com) after interaction with him he instructed me on what to do, after then i should have sex with the my husband or any man I love in this world, And i did so, within the next one months i went for a check up and my doctor confirmed that i am 2 weeks pregnant with two babies. I am so happy!! If you also need help to get pregnant or need your ex back then contact his email address: miraculouscentre@gmail.com or through His private WhatsApp number is +393512071278. My Blog: https://righteva05.blogspot.com
ARE YOU IN NEED OF HELP TO SOLVE YOUR INFERTILITY PROBLEM OR GET PREGNANT? contact Dr. LUCAS Miracle Center on this email (miraculouscentre@gmail.com) I have been trying to get pregnant for 6 years and I needed help! I have been to different hospitals and Doctors. The doctors always say that my husband and I are fine and I don’t know where else to turn. Until one day an old friend introduced me to this great spell caster who helped her to get her lost husband back with a love spell and also made her pregnant, So I decided to contact this spell caster Dr. Lucas on his email (miraculouscentre@gmail.com) after interaction with him he instructed me on what to do, after then i should have sex with the my husband or any man I love in this world, And i did so, within the next one months i went for a check up and my doctor confirmed that i am 2 weeks pregnant with two babies. I am so happy!! If you also need help to get pregnant or need your ex back then contact his email address: miraculouscentre@gmail.com or through His private WhatsApp number is +393512071278. My Blog: https://righteva05.blogspot.com
Wow. This is a powerful post! Truth bomb after truth bomb!
I am so honored to be a part!
I’m so grateful for you, Caroline! Thanks again for taking the time to contribute. Praying that the Lord continues to bless our ministries! xo
Such a great post of truth about fertility, thank you sharing.
I’m so glad that it spoke to you today! I pray it blesses you and brings you much hope!
“I must not be praying enough” was a big lie I felt during our ten year infertility battle. I thought I must not have enough faith that He could get me pregnant. I also wondered if He knew I’d be an awful mom and was saving me from myself…
None of this was true. It wasn’t a lack a faith or character. Although God never answered my prayer directly, as I never became pregnant and am now in year five of accepting my childless life, I know that this is not a punishment. He loves me, and He did answer my prayer for children, just differently than I expected. I am blessed with beautiful nieces and nephews, as well as a wonderful foreign exchange daughter who has become family and the cutest fur-baby there ever was!
And as for who am I if I’m not a mom? Well, I’m a wife, dog mom, aunt, host mom, infertile woman who is embracing her childless not by choice life. I’m a woman who hopes to offer inspiration to those struggling, showing that there is joy after pain…
Blessings, love, and hugs to you all..
Brandi, DROP THE MIC! So grateful that the Lord has brought you to these truths! Look at what He is doing through you already 🙂 He will continue to work for our good! xo
Thanks to each and every one of you woman for sharing. So encouraging. I’m approaching year 8 of waiting.
I’m so sorry that you have to go through this, Jessica. I’m glad you found our post encouraging! Praying it continues to bless you, strengthen you, and give your heart rest. xo
Thank you so much for this blog and God bless you – I was on the verge of suicide but this has been so encouraging! My church is silent on infertility, thank you ladies for sharing your struggles, let’s keep each other in prayer.
Oh Tina, I’m grateful that the Lord led you to this post. I’m so sorry that your church isn’t quite caring for the needs of its people.
Sister, please believe, know, and trust that your Heavenly Father has a GOOD plan for your life here on earth. None of what you experience is wasted in His mighty hands. You are worth more than many sparrows according to our Christ (Matthew 10:29-31). I’m praying right now that you would be strengthened by the Spirit to fight the lies of the enemy about who you are and that you are worthless or less loved because you don’t yet have a child. I’m praying that you would feel the heights and depths of His love for YOU, Tina. Our Savior knew suffering too — but it wasn’t the end for Him. Because you’ve put your faith in Him, eternal life without pain and suffering is yours — and not only that, Heavenly rewards and glory too! Please reach out for help from a biblical counselor or a trusted pastor. And don’t hesitate to reach out to me again, too. <3
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My husband and I were separated for a year and two months. I want to reconcile but he doesn’t seem to want it. He doesn’t answer my text, emails, or phone calls. I don’t know if I should go up there and try to talk to him again or just give him what he wants: divorce. Like I said I don’t want that and I’ve prayed and tried to reconcile but nothing from him just silence. Since I left he has been arrested, doing drugs and looking at porn. There was also evidence that he might be doing more. I found condoms, blood on his sheets, and found what looks like sex toys! I have also seen on his bank statement that he spent money at a sex store. What do I do??? Some people tell me to get rid of him and others tell me to pray for a miracle but how long do I wait for him to tell me. It takes two to do the tango and he won’t even come to the dance floor. I almost started thinking I made the mistake of marrying someone I was unequally yoked to but I don’t want to make another mistake either, so I have been very hopeful until I was introduced to Dr Ozigidon, a powerful spell caster who ends all these problems within a few days. Thanks to Dr Ozigidon for his unforgettable powerful spell. Reach out to him for whatever you may desire to make you happy.. Email (drozigidonhenz.spell.net@gmail.com) . Dr Ozigidon, i will forever be grateful. I bless the day I contacted this great man.
This is my story of Grace. It took me so many thoughts to post this because I know I would be judge by those who knows nothing about infertility. But after realizing that people are out there facing same issues so I decided to publish my testimony with give and shit about me being judged. I am 38 year old, I got married to my husband at the age of 24 years. Unfortunately I was diagnosed with PCOS during my marriage. Due to diagnosed as pre-diabetic I was given metformin. I was now coming in normal range and ovulating on my own. After putting a bit of pressure on, I was given clomid from May, 3 years ago. I got to my 4th round of clomid awaiting AF to start the 5th round. I had an appointment with a specialist and asked to start IVF if i don’t get pregnant till march last year. I did as i was told but still, there was no difference. This is my story of ups and downs on the road of infertility so far. Along with all these body issues which make me come under the ‘infertile’ zone, women like me have to deal with criticism. Infertility is a lonely place and no one understands what it feels like, other than people who are going through it.Today i am pregnant with a set of twins after i choose to contact a spell caster called, Dr Ozigidon whom i have heard so much about his unique powerful spell. With his powerful spell I was able to conceive and all medical problems disappear. I am really obliged that I found some sites where I can write my heart out and not be judged. contact this wonderful spell caster for help if you wish. drozigidonhenz.spell.net@gmail.com .. Infertility is a lonely world.
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For several years my husband and I tried to get pregnant. He and I went to the doctors to get checked out severally. I have eaten right and exercise most of my life and just found it heartbreaking when the doctor discovered that I had Ovarian CYSTS on my UTERUS and other infertility issues . I had the cysts removed but that did not start our wishes right away. A friend of mine told me about something she did, contacting a spell caster, Dr Ozigidon. Once, I tried her steps by contacting this same man on email drozigidonhenz.spell.net@gmail.com and with his spiritual prayers and powerful spell my husband and I had success, I became pregnant and finally gave birth to a wonderful set of twins . Dr Ozigidon did it all for us. Contact him on whatsapp (+2349054750112) I pray everyone gets the opportunity to have their dreams come true of becoming a parent, because it is a wonderful experience and a love like no other holding your bundle of joy!
ARE YOU IN NEED OF HELP TO SOLVE YOUR INFERTILITY PROBLEM OR GET PREGNANT? contact Dr. LUCAS Miracle Center on this email (miraculouscentre@gmail.com) I have been trying to get pregnant for 6 years and I needed help! I have been to different hospitals and Doctors. The doctors always say that my husband and I are fine and I don’t know where else to turn. Until one day an old friend introduced me to this great spell caster who helped her to get her lost husband back with a love spell and also made her pregnant, So I decided to contact this spell caster Dr. Lucas on his email (miraculouscentre@gmail.com) after interaction with him he instructed me on what to do, after then i should have sex with the my husband or any man I love in this world, And i did so, within the next one months i went for a check up and my doctor confirmed that i am 2 weeks pregnant with two babies. I am so happy!! If you also need help to get pregnant or need your ex back then contact his email address: miraculouscentre@gmail.com or through His private WhatsApp number is +393512071278. My Blog: https://righteva05.blogspot.com
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